I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
