So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
