dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
