how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
