I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
