You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
false alarm. still invincible.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
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