You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
