question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
