Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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