We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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