i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
