been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
