i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
