Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I'm at about main and main street
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
