its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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