I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
