she looked like the before picture.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Randomize
