I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
