Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
