How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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