He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
My vagina is officially offended.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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