The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
