I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
We are two peas in an std pod
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
