he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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