Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
