How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
