under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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