Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
