Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
