I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I cut my penus on the lid.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I just want to make out with him forever
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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