with your own penis?
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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