I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
