i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I could have mohawked her pubes.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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