I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
