Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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