I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
there is glitter all over my balls
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
