What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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