somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
