No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Randomize
