Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
