Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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