my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
