it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just gift wrapped bread.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
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