The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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