I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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