I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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