I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
