Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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