hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
