Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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